Powerful questions are one of the most useful tools I use to coach other people and to reframe my own thinking.
Here are some questions I’ve been asking myself these days:
1. How can I make this joyful?
I find this question useful whether I’m about to start a task I don’t relish, I’m sitting down to formulate a plan to move my business in a new direction or I’m starting a conversation.
You can use this question to approach almost any decision. It can be especially good at helping you cut through your negative mind chatter. It will also open you to a way to make whatever you’re doing feel light and fun and purposeful.
2. How can I do this in a way that feels uniquely me?
This is an important question for me because I’ve always been a bit of a rebel. When I was a little kid, my friends complained I was bossy. It’s true. I’m happiest when I’m doing things my way. Like the Frank Sinatra song.
Even if you don’t have that same rebel edginess in you, this can still be a very useful question for you.
Every single one of us on the planet has something special about us. We have distinct experiences of life. Our brains aren’t wired in the same ways. We have our own approaches and ways to think through things. We embrace different enthusiasms.
Our individual idiosyncrasies are exactly the things that allow us to create the most value – for ourselves and the world.
This question will have you soon delighting in all the ways you’re different.
3. What way of approaching this most aligns with my personal values?
Sometimes I can go down the “efforting” path, lost in trying to accomplish some goal. I forget to step back to consider whether the goal I’ve chosen truly reflects something important and worthy to me.
If there’s a part of you that feels uncomfortable with some of the decisions you’ve made, this can be an excellent question to help you move your life in a direction that feels truly worthwhile to you.
4. If I were free to say anything what would it be?
This question helps me identify situations when I’m holding back on something I secretly believe is valuable. I’ll often notice that I’m choosing not to say something because I’m worried about how other people might judge me.
We get so used to pleasing other people that we sometimes don’t even realize just how much we’re constraining ourselves from saying things we believe are important.
If you’re like the rest of us, the fear of judgment might be what’s holding you back from contributing the value you have inside.
5. Is this thing I’m considering doing something that’s kind to me now AND honors my future self?
I love this question – present AND future focussed.
Try it out. It strikes a great balance between the future you want to create and the life you’re experiencing now. I want you to enjoy ALL of it.
Ask yourself one or more of these questions this week. You might be surprised about the impact these questions can have on your thinking about the best way to move forward.
