Time is short. Here’s how to stop chasing and start choosing.

At this stage of life, many women find themselves in a quiet reckoning. After decades of caregiving, careers, and keeping everything afloat, there’s a new question rising to the surface: What do I actually want to do with the time I have left?

Oliver Burkeman’s Meditations for Mortals doesn’t give you a list of goals or a roadmap to reinvention. Instead, it offers a more radical suggestion: Stop trying to conquer time. Stop optimizing every minute. Let go of the fantasy that one day, you’ll get it all under control. And start living as if time is not a resource to manage—but a mystery to honor.

7 Life Lessons from Meditations for Mortals by Oliver Burkeman for Women in Later Life

Here are the key takeaways for Lifeshiift readers:

1. You Are Not in Control—And That’s a Good Thing

We’ve been trained to believe that being in control means we’re doing life right. But Burkeman turns that idea inside out:

“To be delighted by another person or moved by a landscape or a work of art, requires not being in full control.”

Letting go of control isn’t failure—it’s the first step toward wonder. And for women who have spent years managing everyone else’s needs, this can feel both foreign and freeing.

2. Forget the To-Do List—Try a Done List Instead

You’ll never finish everything. That’s not a personal shortcoming—it’s a human truth. Burkeman gently reminds us to stop treating life like a giant list of tasks to complete.

Instead, he suggests a done list:

“My favourite way of combating the feeling of productivity debt in everyday life is to keep a ‘done list’—a record not of the tasks you plan to carry out but of the ones you’ve completed.”

For women used to measuring their days in output, this small shift offers deep relief—and a new kind of satisfaction.

3. Let Go of the Fantasy of Getting to Everything

We’ve all got a “to-read” pile, a backlog of articles, podcasts, and books we should consume. But Burkeman offers a new metaphor:

“Treat your to-read pile as a river, not a bucket… a stream that flows past you from which you get to pick a few choice items.”

This idea extends to life itself. You don’t need to do it all, see it all, or know it all. In fact, you can:

“Resist the urge to stockpile knowledge.”

Choose what matters now, and trust it’s enough.

4. Let the Future Take Care of Itself (Mostly)

Women often carry the emotional labor of anticipating every possible future scenario. But Meditations for Mortals reminds us that:

“You could devote less energy to manipulating the future, and have more faith in your capacity to handle things once the challenge actually arrives.”

What a relief—to release the pressure of pre-solving everything.

5. Decide by Doing

It’s easy to get stuck in the “thinking about it” phase—especially during life transitions. Burkeman’s advice is deceptively simple:

“A decision doesn’t count as a decision until you’ve done something about it in reality—no matter how small.”

A single small step, taken in real life, has more power than hours of inner debate. This is especially true when we’re reinventing ourselves in midlife.

6. Follow the Life Task Calling You Now

Not everything that calls to you needs to be grand. Some desires feel quiet. Some nudges show up in unexpected places. Pay attention.

“A life task is something your life is asking of you.”

It’s about listening. What’s calling you right now? A creative project? A conversation? A long walk by the lake? That’s the life task.

7. Seek Out ‘Good Difficulty’

Burkeman distinguishes between draining effort and meaningful effort. He calls the latter “good difficulty”—the kind that stretches you.

“Good difficulty enlarges you.”

At Lifeshiift, we believe that challenge doesn’t end at retirement—and neither does growth. The key is choosing challenges that matter to you now.

A Lifeshiift Perspective:

Meditations for Mortals is not a bucket list book. It’s a mindset shift—an invitation to live more deeply, not more perfectly.

For women over 50, this is a life-giving message. You don’t have to conquer time. You don’t have to fix everything. You don’t have to do it all before sunset.

You just have to pay attention. Let go a little. Choose what (and who) matters. And take that first small, real-world step toward the life that’s calling you now.

Because you’re not here to manage your life.
You’re here to live it.

If you’ve read Meditations for Mortals, we’d love to hear: What insight stayed with you the most?